Oh, hi there! Thanks for stopping by

We are newish to the scene together, but are trying to get in to the swing of things. And thus we seek like minded folk with warm bodies, and warm genitals for good company with a chance of messy... "Fun" puddles... We don't have much for expectations or goals (that one's a lie), but we are looking to dip our toes in slowly. Although, we occasionally show signs of terrible impatience... Squirrel!! On that, we'd prefer to get to know people out for a beer or something in-person-like, rather than endlessly messaging back and forth.

And with this we vow to always put pleasure before not putting things in our mouths, and to always keep things just serious enough, no more, and sometimes distastefully less. You have been warned.

We feel it's worth mentioning...

We have a fucking machine.

*drops the rubber dong being held as a microphone