Blocked profiles...our reasons for using it. It's not ideal, but as of right now it's all we got.

I didn't block you because of something you did !!!

Now that that's out of the way...

There is no "swipe left" option on SH...

I reached out to SH quite a while ago and explained that something similar would be a useful addition...that way people's feelings are not hurt...let's face it, blocking can be perceived negatively. They are looking into it 😀

Fortunately, there are lots of profiles to look at for potential matches.

Unfortunately, there is not a good way to manage them efficiently.

Me personally, I can't keep track of all the profiles, conversations and interactions. I use the block feature as a "site management tool". am I happy about it? No...but I haven't found a better alternative that works for me.

Clicking on a profile, looking at the pics again, rereading the profile, and having to click on the notes...then read the notes again...quite frankly I don't have the time for that.

We have been on this site for over 8 years, had nearly 47,000 views on our profile with more messages then we could count...so yes it has been overwhelming...and like most of you this isn't the only site we are on. Something has to give.

So here is how I use the block feature to manage profiles...

As an example :

You have replied " too far" or "not a connection" = block

You have identified "must" haves in potential playmates, we didn't meet your criteria = block

Your not interested we have reached out to 2-3 times, you read it and never replied = block

Your not serious, your profile doesn't have any pics and lacks content = block

Your age range is set at "18-50" = block

Our age range is set at "40-60" = generally block for anything +/- by 2 years

Outside of the distance range criteria = block

We reviewed your entire profile, it's not a connection for us = block

Only .01% gets blocked because of rude or inappropriate behavior, the other %...no connection from either their side or ours.

A block doesn't mean we are not interested in you as people or vanilla friends...it just means that there isn't the criteria there for a LS connection...and that's why we are on this site. We will never be rude or ignore you in a social setting because of a block...that's not us.😀 We expect the same in return.

Now we can easily focus on potential matches, reply to messages in a timely manner and only spend a few minutes a day on the site...because we have permanently eliminated profiles that are not a match. And as an added bonus saved those that are not a match for us from wasting their time reading our profile 😀win win

We agree with pretty much everything you wrote, it would be nice to have a quick to see way to know you've explored a profile and there isn't a match (sometimes it's them that said no...lol). I would prefer a stronger block though for obnoxious profiles which I don't mind them seeing, right now a profile you've blocked cam PM you in chat. I know you can set to restrict PM's but we don't want to restrict PM's from profiles we might be interested in, just block PM's from profiles we've blocked...

I agree blocking is an issue We very seldom block on other sites , through a competitor to this site has an issue with the location of the blocking key. Rely on memory and reading profiles to approach other couples would be interested in a novel way of seeing who is a match filters not very effective, maybe some clever algorithm.

Here is my 2 cents worth as a dreaded single male but this could apply to anyone and I think a lot of folks can relate. I have been on SH for many years and might have sent 20 or so messages in that time yet have viewed most likely thousands. I the great majority of times my viewing is spawned by SH's "these profiles are matches" so I have a look. Very seldom is the recommendation even close but it's always worth a click. Other times it's people who viewed my profile or when I'm in a chat room and visit a profile of a chatter to more or less vet who might have enough common interests to be willing to say howdy. So what is my gripe? When someone visits my profile that I have never been too and just simply blocked me. They had the option to read my "public" profile yet deny me the same courtesy. Basically they are telling me that they are worthy of looking in my window but I have no right to look out my window to see who's looking in. That is just plain bad manners at least and could maybe even be considered bullying to some degree which actually might even open up SH to potential actioning, (not likely but possible). So in my dumb little single males mind, what would be a better solution? It's a two fold idea, 1st create a new section on a profile that lists criteria for contact. This could be a simple click and add such as "must be" with a clickable list and a second list that could be a " must not be" clickable list. These lists don't even have to be on the actual profile but could be a hidden file as it is only accessed by 2nd idea. The 2nd part of this is another algorithm is written that compares the views stats to the profile owners list and if there is any conflict then a message would pop up saying that "sorry your profile does not meet the contact specifications of this profile so your message has been blocked" This would still leave one avenue open for a conversation by still allowing the profile owner access to the searchers profile, as it does now, and if the profile owner tried to send a message and the searcher had no conflicting restrictions on their profile then a message could go through. This solution, albeit rough as it is, could eliminate the hard feelings that can happen no as an actual person is not telling someone else that they're not good enough to look at them, even though it's a public profile, but that they are not a match as determined by predetermined criteria. Sorry I was long winded but I think this is a problem that deserves a solution. It will be interesting to see if it's addressed.

Kenith, thanks for your points.😀

There is a very important point to keep in mind...without couples this is not a swingers site, it is a singles site.😈

You shouldn't be upset that you got thousands of views, at least people are looking. I would be more upset if you didn't get any.

Couples are looking to see if someone is a match to join them, and if for whatever reason they don't feel it's a connection it's well within their rights to eliminate the profile from the pool. They have done you a favor, they have made it easier for you to find a potential match...less profiles to look at.

It's tougher for single males on a swinger site then on a regular dating site maybe even 100X harder, the bar is set much much higher. The ladies already have a partner, so that part is out of the equation. The average Joe has the deck stacked against him, you need game. Go to any club on days when single guys are permitted, a select few get action the rest of the towel sharks are watching...hoping...but that's as far as it goes. The younger, fitter, taller, better equipped, good looking guys get picked...Joe is on the bench.

Now single women looking to join a couple, the bar is set lower....in most cases. It's a major double standard! Is it fair? You be the judge of that...😀

How about the incomplete profiles with one word and no picture, they are here looking at other peoples profiles and pics for their own enjoyment without reciprocating...we are all being used...yet no mention of looking in the window there?

I gave a list of reasons why a profile gets blocked...the very last one is if they are not a match for us...most eliminate us well before we get to that point...age, preference, location etc....it's probably 90-95%.

We are here to actually meet people...so as an example, your profile would have never made it to a review if we were interested or not for 2 reasons on our list:

Age

Location

It has nothing to do with good enough...

That's not discrimination or bullying...it's people's preferences to make a very personal choice...

This is not a vanilla site, if it was you would be correct.

Hi folks, I either wrote this wrong or you is-read it. I was saying that I've viewed hundreds if not thousands of profiles but have only ever sent maybe a couple dozen messages. Why, because I know I was what the other profile was looking for, wrong age range, body type etc, so it would be foolish and inconsiderate of me to bother them. In other words people can look without being a bother, and you are very right, couples are certainly required. I may suggest you might re-read what I wrote as you are making points that I wasn't. I'll take your last point first, blocked due to age/location. That is exactly what the algorithm would look for, it would check and should I try to make contact with you, automatically block it with "Sorry, you are not a match based on our criteria", (so something like that). What this does is remove the person blocking person and instead goes with criteria blocking person. Think of it as, "you have to be this high to ride this ride", the ticket taker (profile owner) didn't refuse you, the criteria did. Incidentally, I never once referred to any contacts I've received, certainly a swinger site will have ton's more men than couples and most couples are looking for other couples. Any reasonable person (male) should know this and accept it when they join. I understand couples frustrations in being bombarded with unsolicited messages from men who aren't even close to what they are looking for, hence the automatic blocking algorithm. I'm nor trying to start a war, I'm trying to start a conversation, one that can work to find a solution. Oh, by the way your point about vague or basically profiles, again that is taken care of in my idea... the list could and should easily include "must have completed profile and photo" or what ever else works. This shouldn't be adversarial but rather cooperative. I hope this clarifies my position. Cheers

Was just adding my 2 cents and addressing some of your points...😀

I get and understand some of the points one here of blocking someone. For me personally, I don't see the point in blocking someone that you've had no interactions with, or never intend to have any interactions with. And that is just my personal opinion and that.

We've blocked maybe 2 people, but that was because they were becoming extremely aggressive and the pursuit of us, for lack of a better term, despite being told that we weren't interested.

Personally I have no issues with being blocked...a good way to know there is no interest in getting to know me . Have fun everyone :).